Over the past few months I have seen posts of people I went to high school or grew up with announcing their engagement, marriage, or children. I’m 18. They’re getting married and I have yet to be in a relationship. Should I start buying my cats now?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for them. This isn’t going to be a post where I talk about how ridiculous it is to get married young because I don’t believe that’s true. I know plenty of marriages where people got married young and it lasted forever. If you found your soulmate and know you want to spend the rest of your life with them already, then I’m so glad you did.
The marriage posts used to bring me down a little, and make me think that I’m falling behind. These people are getting married and I have yet to have a boyfriend. But they don’t do that anymore. Since I was in middle school I thought that I was missing out on being in a relationship. Back then I would probably go out with anyone who asked just to finally be able to say I had a boyfriend. Of course no one did because I was the biggest nerd you could imagine. I’m actually grateful for that because middle school is definitely too young to start dating. Then in high school I got asked out a few times, but I didn’t want to go out with anyone I couldn’t see myself marrying. I don’t mean that I would only date someone unless I knew I would marry them, but if I couldn’t see myself committing for a long time I didn’t see the point of getting into something that wouldn’t work out and end in getting hurt.
I have standards and I’m picky when it comes to dating, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t fallen for guys. I have and I’ve gotten hurt in the process. Of course the guys I liked never felt the same way back, or at least they didn’t show it.
I was never ok with being single. I was always longing to be with someone. Until recently.
In these past few months I have fully realized how absolutely amazing it is to be single. I am blessed with so many amazing guy friends that I know I wouldn’t be able to get close with if I had a significant other. They’re so great because they help me if I need it and I can have my brotherly love without anything getting weird. If I need a date for something I can ask one of them. What’s even better is the fact that unlike a relationship with one guy that might end in a break up, these friendships with a bunch of guys can last forever.
Being single, I get to learn new things about myself everyday. I get to be selfish and do things just because I want to do them, go places just because I want to go. I moved away to college to be independent, and not just from my parents. I get to be independent from anyone. I try new things and go on adventures everyday. I’ve discovered that I’m super spontaneous, I love adventures, and I actually do like avocado after hating it for years. I feel like later on in life when I am in a relationship or married I’ll look back on this time and wish I could be single for a little longer. I have been able to fall in love with myself and that’s more important right now than trying to fall in love with someone else.
So congratulations to all of my friends getting married soon. I truly hope everything works out, but you won’t see me posting about my engagement anytime soon. I say that, but who knows, maybe the Lord has something in store sooner than I thought. Until then, I’ll be happy for you and be extremely joyful for me and where I am in life, happy and completely single.